SHERMAINE'S WORLD ★

sometimes friendship may end as you blink an eye.

i just read jy's blog.
i seriously never meant to hurt you, or anything, but i hope you can understand that the vibe i sort of received from you is that you're pushing me away, and it kinda felt like we werent the best friends we were before...
if i hurt you, im really sorry...
im sorry im such a coward, not willing to face this head on and just declaring it on my blog.
im sorry for being so unreasonable and not hearing your reason why im receiving this vibe.
im sorry for being such an idiot friend and not understanding you.
im sorry if you think im a very bad friend and dont deserve your friendship.
im sorry i never realised all this before.
and im very, very sorry that our friendship may end just because of this.
the possibility that our friendship will end right now is unanimous, and i darent hope too much.
i guess its all my fault, im to blame, but there's no turning back.
but one last thing i want to say...
thank you for being my friend.

..........

im trying very, very hard not to regret the 'speech' i just posted in my last entry. i just hope that things would work out... if not, then maybe its just me being a crappy and sucky friend.

no subject

lol. my science test scored 8/10. crap, huh. just one more teeny little mark...
later going to yizheng's blog. anticipating it ;D
today sjab got one person look soooo pale. mygod, his lips were so white.
then we keep doing footdrill, FA case...during the 2omins when m'am rita going through the homenursing procedures, i was very close to sleeping. it was like my eyes couldnt open.

anyway.
TO JIAYUAN AND CO.:
im not that stupid.. i can sense that, well, you (all) have been acting kind of weird. and bu shuang. hey, yo.my guess is that you all think that im very act or something, just because i take tuition and score well for test(s). but i dont think im like that...though, i must admit, im not to judge what i am. so if i really kind of act (i really dont realise it), could you please just, you know, just tell me: "dont act lah", and i'll try to change... or if you all really just hate it, just say it to my face. no bad feelings, seriously. not to offend, but...
CRAP. IM SURE YOU ALL WILL BREAK OFF OUR FRIENDSHIP. OH, CRAP. anyway...lets just say im a coward, i cant say this 'speech' to your face.

unclassified shit, part three .. .

last sunday
after tuition. i went to my father's big brother's house. (well, i call him ah beh)
he had organized a lion dance something something (in chinese, is wu shi)
so i went to watch.
did i say that i cant stand cigarette smoke?
well, i cant.
and so i smelled the smoke after i stepped out of the lift.
blehhs, horrible.
then i didnt dare step into the house. ya know why?
the lion dance people (all guys) were crowded on the sofa.
some were sitting, some were on the floor...it looked like a pack of people.
and it was rather intimidating, those people staring at me while i stood in the doorway.
ha, so i retreated. i only went in after my mom and dad went in.
and i never gave them a glance.
i helped my cousin set up her computer, and then, soon, my cousin's cousins came over with their malay neighbours. cute boys, they were, but they were too shy. and my cousin's cousin was sort of flirting with him. mind you, the eldest of the malay boys was younger than my cousin's cousin. then it started.
the lion was coming. and i realised that the wu shi guys were mega cute.
well, not the old ones. i meant the young ones.
some were round, some were skinny, some were tall.
all were handsome.
and i was watching them instead of the dance, ha ha.
but you people know me, i wont ever flirt with someone older than me.
then it was like, the wu shi guys keep going to toilet. and they sure took a hell of a time peeing.
what the fuck. i realised that they were smoking inside the toilet after peeing.
i wanted to give them a slap, really.
they'd die young, so what's the freaking point of smoking?
just too bad they were so devastatingly cute.
the guy holding the lion's head, he sure was having fun!
he drank carlsberg while holding the head, sitting down. then he peeked through the mouth of the lion's head, scouring for people.
then he spat the carlsberg at the people!
i was like giving this, oh-my-god-what-the-heck-??? look.
jesus! he spat it out!
jesus, and he was laughing.
luckily i didnt get splashed.
my aunt, ah mah and my ah um kena, though.
ha ha.
they had to buy toto with the number.
then they retired and went to eat. my ah beh ordered a buffet.
and my cousin was soooo lame.
she told me, "jie jie, you hungry le right? come lets go eat!"
then i told her, "sze hui, you want to eat, right? want eat say lah! want i help you take?"
then she was like trying to mask it that i found out. she said, "i where got? come i know you hungry lah lets go take!"
and she was dragging me rather hard. what the heck.
so i went out. the wu shi guys were eating with noises.
ha. guys.
i said, "want anot? want i help you take?"
then one wu shi guy interrupted, saying, "xiao mei mei, yao bu yao wo bang ni na?"
then my cousin was blushing furiously and clutching at me.
she didnt want to take, so i took mee goreng, mushrooms, chicken, cream puffs and a eclair.
then i left my cousin there while i sat at a chair.
then my cousin's cousin came out and ask her whether want to go eat. and my cousin followed.
what freaks.
after that i went inside to eat coz either i was staring too much at the wu shi guys, or the wu shi guys were staring at me as if i was some sort of freak.
i finished my food. then i wanted somemore.
the stupid hot air balloons were still sitting at the sofa. i wish i could kick their freaking fat butts. and slap their freaking obnoxious children. assholes.
so i went out. the wu shi guys were still outside.
their legs were blocking me so i said, "sorree~ !"
and a wu shi guy (whose leg was blocking me) said, "neverminddd~ !"
what the hell. tease people much?
the mee goreng was very spicy. i drank two cups of water.
then there was a second batch of wu shi guys after the first batch of chinese wu shi guys went back.
the second batch was all malay. and all wearing black in colour.
wow.
all very cute too. the young ones.
but then it almost spoilt my eardrums. ouch.
but cute, all the same.
then we were watching little nyonya (xiao niang re)
quite nice, actually. i watched until episode five. then i went home...
shit, gotta do lit homework.
cheers, people.